mr-t-hof

As we’ve done for the better part of the week, we’ve been counting down the days to WrestleMania XXX, which is tonight. Last night, the WWE paid tribute to its heroes of yesteryear with the 2014 WWE Hall of Fame Induction ceremony. LIn true WWE fashion there were bits of comedy, emotion and warm feelings all abound.

Look, I probably shed thug tears over Jake “The Snake” Roberts induction and how his gravely voice, ravaged by drug use and alcoholism still managed to deliver more than its fair share of quotes about how a pro wrestler essentially masturbates the crowd’s emotions, that the ring was the only woman he never cheated on and more. I also anticipated that The Ultimate Warrior’s speech would probably be the most biting and finger pointing speech ever. Billed as the “most anticipated speech” in WWE history, Warrior however made peace with the 2005 DVD the company released called The Self Destruction Of The Ultimate Warrior and praised the industry, joked about how Vince McMahon needed to find a way to call the company the WWF again (“can’t believe those wildlife guys kicked your ass!”) and some praise for the guys who work backstage who deserved their own award.

Yet, Mr. T’s induction speech, which was more of a giant sermon that barely mentioned the industry that was inducting him turned into easily the most awkwardly hilarious speech ever. How long can you go on about loving your mother? Mr. T did – for thirty minutes. How many days can you love your mother? Every day if you’re Mr. T who proceeded to name every holiday with a “Day” attached to it. Watch a preview of the speech below and even that doesn’t give the speech true justice.