I had to have a part two. I mean, even those respectable ladies from the opposite side of the pigment tree gotta get some love, right? And Coco, she would be apart of this list but I’m afraid she falls under the Honorable Mention category. On with the women!

Jennifer Tilly – I’ve had a thing for Jennifer as long as I can remember. Yes, there’s something about that voice of hers that makes me double-take every time I hear it. If you’ve ever seen Bound and her scene-stealing make-up scene with Gina Gershon, then you understand. Not to mention she kinda turned me on in Bride of Chucky (when she was human of course!)

Rachel McAdams – She’s cute. She’ll win any “take home to mom” contest simply because of that Girl Next Door appeal. And I like her because she can be serious and funny. Yes, I’m a sucker and openly admit to watching The Notebook countless times over, that she was the bomb in Wedding Crashers, along with another member of the Snow Bunny list.

Isla Fisher – After Wedding Crashers, I knew she was crazy. And I knew she was fine as hell nonetheless. She took all of my attention when it came down to which chick Ryan Reynolds should have gotten a hold of in Definitely, Maybe. Not much needs to be said about Miss Fisher, except when it comes to her love (and child carrying) for one Sasha Baron Cohen. Damn you Borat.

Katherine Heigl – I don’t know, call it weird, call it whatever you want but something about the good doctor from Grey’s Anatomy just gets me. Not to mention she’s become the new go-to girl for any romantic comedy (27 Dresses, Knocked Up, The Ugly Truth). Plus, she seemingly has that side that says if you piss me off, you will feel the wrath of a 1000 devils. Or angels, who knows.

Danielle Fishel – I could swear upon my life that Topanga Lawrence introduced me to puberty when watching Boy Meets World. Because I remember when she was flat chested – and then she started developing boobs. And an ass. And by large, Topanga was drillable. Then she fell off of a few years and then came right back around with Dorm Daze. My adoration came back because this was still Topanga and she was still fine as hell. Yes, thick for a white chick and sadly, you know a black man is a sucker for some light pigment and an ass.

Jessica Biel – Speaking of ass, no white woman on this list is crushing Jessica Biel. Yeah, she was a little spunky and bad ass when it came to 7th Heaven but then she smartened up and just started blooming. If you’ve ever seen the Rules of Attraction then you know who Jessica was in that flick, the blonde bimbo who James Van Deer Beek couldn’t help but smash even though he thought she was Shannyn Sossamon. Somehow, the producers of And Now I Pronounce You Chuck and Larry thought Jessica should be the only “straight” thing in the movie – and boy were they right.

Scarlett Johannson – Really, a no contest across the board and that’s before you get to her actual movie career. Yes, I’m well aware she’s going to be in Iron Man 2 and I’m also well aware that she’s fine as hell and would seemingly turn any man into a on command dog for her. By dog I mean an errand boy who’d wait on her every breath. Despite the nice breasts (which isn’t anything to spite because Lord knows they’re nice) she’s actually pretty damn talented and made Lost In Translation even better (even though Bill Murray stole the show). Believe me, if I ever saw Scarlett walking the street, I’m in a Superman cape. She might think I’m crazy – but then, I’d make her understand. You don’t go for the man who can make himself a superhero – you go for the guy who was BORN one.

Stacey Keibler – All my wrestling fans will understand why the beautiful Ms. Keibler is on this list. I mean, she’s leggy as hell, she’s got a great face, a bubbly cheerleader personality (more on cheerleaders later) and has an ass (for a white girl). I mean, what more could you ask for?

Tina Fey – I’m a stickler for comedy and for funny women and there’s something about the chick with glasses from SNL that just does it and I mean DOES it. I can agree with some folks saying, “Wait, she isn’t a model, doesn’t really do a whole heck of a lot besides talk – so why her?” Simple. She’s funny and cute in her own way. I rank her ahead of Sarah Silverman and a little bit ahead of Lisa Lampanelli on my favorite female comedian list.

Hayden Panettierre – I know my homie B. Maxwell would kill over Hayden and after sitting through Bring It On: All or Nothing for twelve times, I slowly had to agree with him. And then she became legal and started wearing sheer dresses with no clothes and looked damn good in a cheerleader’s outfit. Yes, no question we’re going to save you Hayden, we’ll worry about the world later.

Marissa Tomei – Alright, this one started with A Different World. Yes, the first SEASON of A Different World. Then it slightly grew with My Cousin Vinny. A little higher when What Women Want came out and reached its apex with The Wrestler. I know, she looked like a down and out stripper with a heart in Wrestler but I’ll be damned if she hasn’t been a fixture of my white woman dreams for the past twenty years.

Mickie James – You damn right. That video is classic but all my wrestling heads know how sexy and how thick Mickie is. There’s nothing like a woman with talent (and a little silly side to her) and Mickie exhibits both of those traits to a tee. Out of all the Divas on the roster today (with all apologies to Melina, Maryse & Victoria & Beth Phoenix), I’m siding with Mickie all days out of the week, even though that’s Swag’s gal on Smackdown. I’d go through another Money In The Bank match if I knew she was the prize. Yup.

Amanda Bynes – As funny as she was on All That and The Amanda Show it wasn’t like Amanda was going anywhere. She could have stayed in that same age group and I’d still be like, eh, alright. Somehow between the Nick shows and her feature films, there was What I Like About You – and my slight infatuation with the quirkiness began. Don’t lie, you had a slight crush on her too.m

Jizz in my pants.